Cyndi Lauper hit the nail on the head. "When the working day is done, girls, they just want to have fun." And tanning is fun. And reading is fun. And taking a bath is fun. And watching your favorite show on Netflix is fun. And relaxing on the couch is fun. And talking on the phone to your best friend is fun.
And paying bills is not. And cooking is not. And cleaning up after the imaginary dog that we don't even have but are thinking about getting but don't want because it will make messes is not. (Unless you're someone who likes to cook, and then yay for you.. your husband probably thinks you're like, the best thing in the world).
After a day at work, regardless of how "stressful" my day was or was not, I don't want to come home and do a million little things, i.e. laundry, dishes, food making, floor cleaning. So I can just imagine what having kids will be like. Oh, the joy. Nevertheless, I don't have kids right now, so this doesn't have to be about being supermom.
Fun. That's such an operative word. I mean, I feel like things that I think are fun are not things that other people would necessarily enjoy. I could read a book and call it fun, but that may not be your cup of tea. Either way, I feel like it's an important thing.. fun. Work can be long, life can be tiring.. Why not throw some fun in there?! Even if it's just reading a book. I can remember a time not so long ago when I didn't have time to read a single book that wasn't related to the subject of teeth. I got a library card a couple of weeks ago and literally thought I was going to have a breakdown due to pure joy because I was so overwhelmed at the amount of books (and time!) I had to read again. Nerdy much?
Marriage, like anything else, takes a lot of time out of your life. Not that that's a bad thing, not that your shouldn't spend time with your booth thang, BUT I'm gearing toward something here, so just hang tight.
Since we've already established that individuals have their own "fun" things to do, it's fair to say that just because you're attracted to and love someone.. doesn't mean you like the same "fun" things. I can shoot a gun at a target all day long, but if I have to wake up at the crack of dawn and sit in the freezing cold arctic temps to kill a deer and then spend hours in blood and guts for "fun," count me outtttt.
And if I told Cory to sit on the couch and read a book, he might have a heart attack. Or die of boredom. Both, maybe.
With that being said, I get to this: don't lose your identity. Don't stop doing the things that you think are fun. Don't stop reading. Don't stop scrapbooking. Don't stop crocheting. Don't stop your hobbies! They make you who you are; those things give you a special quirk. Just because nobody (like your husband, because chances are your friends are awesome and love the same things that you do!) wants to crochet a scarf with you, doesn't mean you shouldn't do it! Especially if your name is Madilyn and you make me the cutest scarves ever, jussayin.
Fun things make you happy, and happy you is the best you. For the love of everyone around you, trust me.
If being married is about losing yourself and never doing anything that you think is fun, you're doing it wrong. Stop that, and do it right!
