Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.

Cyndi Lauper hit the nail on the head. "When the working day is done, girls, they just want to have fun." And tanning is fun. And reading is fun. And taking a bath is fun. And watching your favorite show on Netflix is fun. And relaxing on the couch is fun. And talking on the phone to your best friend is fun.

And paying bills is not. And cooking is not. And cleaning up after the imaginary dog that we don't even have but are thinking about getting but don't want because it will make messes is not. (Unless you're someone who likes to cook, and then yay for you.. your husband probably thinks you're like, the best thing in the world).

After a day at work, regardless of how "stressful" my day was or was not, I don't want to come home and do a million little things, i.e. laundry, dishes, food making, floor cleaning. So I can just imagine what having kids will be like. Oh, the joy. Nevertheless, I don't have kids right now, so this doesn't have to be about being supermom.

Fun. That's such an operative word. I mean, I feel like things that I think are fun are not things that other people would necessarily enjoy. I could read a book and call it fun, but that may not be your cup of tea. Either way, I feel like it's an important thing.. fun. Work can be long, life can be tiring.. Why not throw some fun in there?! Even if it's just reading a book. I can remember a time not so long ago when I didn't have time to read a single book that wasn't related to the subject of teeth. I got a library card a couple of weeks ago and literally thought I was going to have a breakdown due to pure joy because I was so overwhelmed at the amount of books (and time!) I had to read again. Nerdy much?

Marriage, like anything else, takes a lot of time out of your life. Not that that's a bad thing, not that your shouldn't spend time with your booth thang, BUT I'm gearing toward something here, so just hang tight.

Since we've already established that individuals have their own "fun" things to do, it's fair to say that just because you're attracted to and love someone.. doesn't mean you like the same "fun" things. I can shoot a gun at a target all day long, but if I have to wake up at the crack of dawn and sit in the freezing cold arctic temps to kill a deer and then spend hours in blood and guts for "fun," count me outtttt.

And if I told Cory to sit on the couch and read a book, he might have a heart attack. Or die of boredom. Both, maybe.

With that being said, I get to this: don't lose your identity. Don't stop doing the things that you think are fun. Don't stop reading. Don't stop scrapbooking. Don't stop crocheting. Don't stop your hobbies! They make you who you are; those things give you a special quirk. Just because nobody (like your husband, because chances are your friends are awesome and love the same things that you do!) wants to crochet a scarf with you, doesn't mean you shouldn't do it! Especially if your name is Madilyn and you make me the cutest scarves ever, jussayin.

Fun things make you happy, and happy you is the best you. For the love of everyone around you, trust me.

If being married is about losing yourself and never doing anything that you think is fun, you're doing it wrong. Stop that, and do it right!

Father-in-Laws.

Who knows your husband even better than you know him? His dad, of course. Especially if your husband is the spitting image of his dad in personality. Lucky for you, if you've got the big bad FIL on your side, life will be good. And when life is bad, said FIL can probably help you figure out how to iron out the wrinkles in life, which is the only ironing he may ever do.

Without even knowing it, your husband has given you an ally; a friend with unlimited knowledge of, well, everything about him. An arsenal of priceless information.
Glorious, right?

Last night, Cory asked me if I was insecure about being short, to which I replied no. I mean, come on. There aren't many guys that don't love short girls. We're spunky. Anyways, not the point. So then he asked if it was offensive when people call me a midget. (***please note- I am not a midget***). So I said yeah, and he asked if I would be mad if his dad said that. Game changer. I mean, I wouldn't like it, but it's Rog, ya know? I probably wouldn't be mad, because that's how he is. A jokester. Actually, when he was in the hospital, I think he did call me a midget. But he was in a hospital bed, so it's not like I could just let him have it! I think I just looked at him and said, "Did you just call me a midget?" He did his little Rog laugh, and we went on with life.

Me and Rog, we have a lot in common. A good sense of humor, the ability to take a good teasing and the inability to handle ignorant individuals. Maybe that's why our relationship rocks. One of my favorite things about being married to Cory is spending time with his mom and dad. Mother in law time will come later; I don't want to steal the thunder from Rog. 

If you've ever met him, he's probably made you laugh. He just does that, without even trying. He's a good listener, even if you're complaining about his own kid! Sometimes he's so stubborn you just want to kick him. He tells the best stories. He's an endless source of wisdom and life lessons. Life wouldn't be the same without him; I honestly can't wait for my future kids to meet him.

To prove I'm not the only girl with a great FIL, I asked some FB friends what they love about their husbands father. The responses mostly boiled down to "he's like another dad to me", "he's a great grandpa to my child/children," "he will do anything for family" and "he intentionally modeled a strong and healthy marriage." Those are just a few of my personal favorites. The point is, if you haven't taken the time to sit down and have a really good one on one talk with your husband's father, I'd encourage you to do so. He's probably pretty great. I spend more time with other people, usually women, talking about women stuff (and complaining about the men), but there are few things I love more than hearing Cory's dad tell me that he's proud of me and that he's glad I'm a part of his family. 

And with that, I'm out. 

Things Girls Do.

Things Girls Do That Guys Don't Understand.

1. Gettin' Our Nails Did

For me, that's a personal favorite. Cory used to ask me all the time why I, and I quote, "wasted money" to get my nails done. I just like it. It makes me feel good. I don't see it as a waste, but rather a reward. And that's all that really matters. Duh.

2. Making The Bed

Not everyday, by any means. I used to make my bed every single time I got out of it, but that has changed. Anyway, if it were up to Cory, the bed would never be made. Reasoning? You always have to get back into it, so why make it? Hm.. I'm sure he likes the way he thinks.

3. Putting On Make-Up

You know that song about the guy staring at the girl taking off her make up and not even knowing why she put it on? They probably really do feel that way. But whatever. They don't understand that we feel like our beauty is enhanced with a little help. Cory was probably scared to death the first time he saw me with zero make up on. Fortunately, he's still alive.

4. Wearing Leggings, Boots & Shirts That Are Big Enough To Be His

Okay, get real. The big shirt probably is his. And he'll never know why you have fifteen jillion clothing items and choose to wear his shirts. Good thing is, he doesn't have to understand how comfortable it is because you know.

5. Paying To Have Hair Removed

Hair, eyebrows, etc. Why do we need split ends cut, eyebrows waxed? Well, they just don't know how cute we'd be with caterpillars above our eyes.

There are bound to be more and I'm sure they'll come up eventually, but there's a start.

Now go get your nails did and your brows waxed. And don't forget to wear your leggings.

High School Love vs Real World Love

Hey, now. Don't read that title and get your undies in a wad. No one said that high school love isn't real love, but it's nowhere near the same thing as real world love. According to me, anyways, since this blog is just full of my opinions.

I think it's safe to say that at some point in high school, we all thought we were dating the one. He was so cute or so smart or so athletic; he hung out at your locker waiting for you after class, carried your books, invited you to sit with him at the next basketball game.. or whatever you thought was just so romantic back in the day. I thought it was just pure perfection when I didn't have to carry my own books, and not just because those suckers were heavy, but because when people saw me and my "boyfriend" walking together, they saw him carrying my books. That was a claim laid down, people. He was mine! After all, he was carrying my books! Then again, I also thought that slicking back all of my curly fly-aways was cute too, so we've all been wrong at some point in our lives.

High school seems to be all about finding out who you are, who you want to be. While doing so, it makes sense to want to find someone to be with you. I know tons of couples who dated in high school and got married. One of my best friends got married 5 months after high school and they're going so, so strong. Others were in high school and dated a guy a couple of years older; that works too. Point is, you find out more about yourself after high school than you'd ever think, so how exactly do you know that Mr. Perfect in high school is Mr. Perfect in real life? (That's kind of a trick question, considering they're never all that perfect all the time. You can thank me for the heads up later). Sure, you might know that you were prom queen, a nerd, hilarious, most athletic or flirtiest.. you know these things because the yearbook said it- duh. Oh, and speaking of the yearbook, you were clearly the most popular because way more people signed your yearbook than anyone else's, but back to the point. Who are you after high school? Are you still most athletic or most popular? Who really cares outside of those walls? You have to define yourself in other ways now. Are you hard working? Do you make the best out of stinky situations? Do you go to work on days that you would've skipped school because you don't feel so great? Are you independent?

High school boyfriends can turn into real world husbands. As a romantic, I'm the biggest fan of high school romance turning into wedding bells, trust me. But the truth is, that doesn't happen for a lot of us. For those couples that it did happen for, I am sincerely happy for you! There are so many people outside of the bubble of high school. Cory said something the other day that really made me think; something to the effect of just picking the best of what you've got available to you. See, high school limits your choices. I didn't know Cory in high school. I knew of him, but I didn't know him. I tease him all the time that he was too cocky for me to talk to back then ;) Really, high school can give you the chance to have a relationship that teaches you all kinds of life lessons. Lessons that were learned and you remember them and you would never want to have to repeat that lesson again.

Real world love, on the other hand, isn't about books being carried and going to Homecoming together. Real world love is about helping one another pay the bills, making sure your husband gets fed, washing clothes, buying groceries.. man, sounds boring, huh? But seriously, who hates grocery shopping alone? I do. And I hate having to load the car up and unload it by myself. I love when Cory gets to do that part! That's what it's really about, the little things that make you realize that life is so much more fun with the right person by your side. Real world love is about understanding that you don't have to do things on your own; you have a person. Your person helps you, loves you, calms you, listens to you. I'm independent to the max; I don't like to rely on anyone else to help me, but you know what? It's nice to know that I have someone who is always there, whether I think I need him or not.

High school was about the little things; real life is about the big things. Trust me, your car payment not being paid is a big thing and it's a real life thing. If you're a wife, think about those things that your husband does to make you feel better when you're down, whether it be a foot rub or a get out of cooking dinner card.. small things that you feel are the biggest things at the right time. Aren't you thankful for him? Make sure he knows it!

X.

Jealousy. Isn't that just an everyday, slightly uglier than Arkansas humidity taking it's toll on my hair, part of life?

Every day may be pushing it, but I know that things happen that make me feel jealous, and I hate it. Jealousy is ugly and unbecoming. But there's a short list of things that will just do it to ya, no matter who you are, no matter how great your life is, no matter how awesome your husband is, no matter how many years you've been married, no matter how hard to try to not be jealous; it happens.

What are those things?

Hmm.. Let's see. Ex-Girlfriends. That's the one thing that makes me so jealous, so easily.. and the subject of exes is sometimes much more popular than you want it to be.

Hmm.. you're in luck, ladies and gents, looks like that's actually the beginning and end of my list. Oh, yours too?  Maybe or maybe not. Well, here's the deal. This topic isn't to dwell on the past, but this blog is supposed to be from a young, married girl's point of view, so there it is. Oh sure, there are girls who could waltz right up to your husband and give him a big ole smack on the hind cheeks and squish his cheeks together and just sugar him all over and you wouldn't care. It'd be like his grandma touching him. You don't mind, cause you're not that crazy. But then there are a handful of girls that would just about get the Special Weapons And Tactics team called on you, cause if they so much as look at your man with both of their eyes, it's on.

Don't tell me that maybe one face didn't pop up in your head; it's okay, you really don't have to tell me.

I also hear some girls say that they don't get jealous, they're too confident to be jealous. Then you've got the "I'm only jealous because I care" girls. Then you've got some who are right in the middle of psycho stalker and way too chill.

I'm not gonna act like I haven't had some crazy, psycho moments where I've just wanted to call up a chick and have a "hey, there's an 'ex' in front of 'girlfriend' and you. are. it. so why you tryin' to chat it up with my man" moment. But regardless of the crazy things I've said and done and the crazy things that you've said and done, just remember: you. are. it. You're not the ex. You're the girlfriend. Or the wife. The one he loves;  the guy who gets hair all over the sink and it makes you so mad that you can't handle it? Yeah, him. He loves you, even though you have your insane female moments and talk about girls that he probably hasn't thought about in years. Even though he looks at you like he might be scared to ever make you mad, because now he's seen that you probably are crazy enough to dispose of his body.

Marriage is so much more than talking about exes. They really have no part in your life, your conversations. It's good, important even, to have exes. You learn lessons about yourself and other people that you might not have learned without that person. But then, like every other part of the past, you leave that person in the past, and carry those lessons learned with you, to the future.

So, next time you see someone who has had a romantic history with that guy you love, don't get all crazy and cross-eyed. Instead, remember that he chose you, you chose him, and life is good. Trust me, you'll feel so much better about yourself.

Now, go tell your husband you love him.

Date Night.

In a perfect world of young married life, every couple would set aside one night out of the week to go out together and enjoy themselves.. pure bliss. They would call it date night. On date night, no one would worry about the bills, feel guilty about spending fifteen dollars to see a movie that will probably be out on DVD soon, and nobody would dream of not noticing how beautiful (or handsome) their wife (or husband) looked. Too bad, huh? Too bad that date nights do exist, but they're nowhere near perfection. Too bad that as a wife, or maybe as a female, I can't look at a movie ticket without thinking "Redbox is so much cheaper." And if you do what I do, do what I do next. Think back to how you spend your weekdays. Do you have one of the nasty J words? Yeah, I said it. J-O-B. If you do, stop feeling guilty! I'm not saying blow all your money, but stop feeling guilty about the movie you see once a month, the dinners you go out to because you hate cooking and don't want to are too tired from work to make a delicious meal, the purse you bought yourself because it's been a year since you had a new one (a year is a long time in the life of my purse). 


Just stop. You work, you make money. You deserve to have a little bit of happiness. That's what a movie and some potato soup from Colton's brings me anyway- happiness.

Back to date night. 

Whoever came up with the idea of a date night; brilliant. It's not their fault that when I hear date night, I think of a horse drawn carriage, little black dress, handsome date in a tux, candle lit dinner, gifts of diamonds, etc. Probably because in One Tree Hill, Nathan tried to pick Haley up in a horse drawn carriage, greatly increasing my expectations. (If you haven't gotten the hint yet, I love OTH and highly encourage you to veg out on the couch and watch it for dayzzz).

Reality of date night: it's a night to get away from the house, enjoy some time with your spouse (or boyfriend, girlfriend, whatever), not have to cook dinner and have some fun. Number one tip: try not to get into an argument on date night. Try not to get into arguments, period, but especially on date night. Why? Because it's date night. It's really hard to be romantic and lovey dovey when you're fighting over the radio and temperature in the vehicle. Hold hands on date night. It's really hard for Cory to be mad at me when we're holding hands. But sometimes we fight because he won't hold my hand. Like he needs two hands to push the buggy in Wal Mart. Go figure.

Also, if you go on date nights every night, it's no longer date night. It's not special. It's the norm. So, keep it special. Once a week, once every two weeks. Heck, if you're me and Cory, once every six months. We eat ice cream and watch Netflix on the reg, so life is pretty great. It would be hard to have a date night top watching One Tree Hill and eating Rocky Road, would it not? 

Date night doesn't mean drive to Vegas or go sky diving.. just do something that you and your S.O. enjoy, even if it's just bowling. Golfing (I hate golf, but hey, maybe some man is lucky enough to have a golf loving wife). Watching lame movies (Cory thinks every movie I pick is lame). Maybe going on a picnic. Looking at the stars. Whatever you're doing, you're doing it with someone that you love. 

Date nights don't have to involve spending a lot of money, because face it. Sometimes we're just flat broke. No money for movies. No money for steak dinners. No money for renting ugly shoes to throw a heavy ball down a lane. No money period. That's where picnics and stargazing come in. If Cory asked me to go lay in the truck bed and look at the stars, I'd probably think he was on drugs or think that he wanted something huge, like a new truck or something. Nonetheless, I'd do it. Free and cute. Just the way I like.

Date night.

Keep your expectations simple: have fun. Wherever, whatever- just enjoy yourselves. 

And then, do it again.

Date nights forever. 

Work It Out.

First, for all of you that think it's been a while since I posted, just know that I did post.. and then accidentally deleted it when I was trying to delete a draft. So that was a good day.

Second, the title of this post is two-fold. Work it out. As in, exercise. Also, as in arguments.

Arguments.. easier to work out than the body most of the time. According to me, anyways. I'd rather think of a jillion ways to end a fight than increase my heart rate.

Is that just how life is when you get married? Life is busy. You work, he works. It seems like surely the time that you have off together should be spent together, not doing other things like working out. Right? WRONG.

I had that mindset for a little while. It was almost like I felt guilty for spending time doing something other than being with Cory. On a typical day, he wakes up at the crack of dawn, I wake up later than that, we both go to work, I get home around 5:30, he gets home between 6:30 and 8:00.. we're ready to eat, bathe and go to bed. Who has time to spread love and kind words and work out too?! We tried to work out together, but his legs are the length of my body, so we don't run well together. He's just too fast. So there went that. Besides, running is my favorite form of exercise and it's not his. It just wasn't a good fit.

So once I decided I was too busy to work out, I just kinda went with it. Working, crafting, eating, cooking (hamburger helper and the like, of course). 

Point is, I got tired of looking in the mirror and seeing something that I knew could be better if I would make time for working out. I was using getting married as an excuse. 

So, newlyweds, (and not newlyweds) your husband loves you. Big or small, short or tall, they love us all. But are you loving yourself enough to be the healthiest version of you that you can be? 

Maybe I'm completely rambling, but I feel like I see this happen all the time. Life (& marriage, sometimes) gets in the way of being healthy.

So, I'm working out. I'm running. Not every day. But Cory doesn't complain, I can tell you that. He's probably thinking "Hallelujah, praise Jesus. Bout time that girl got her run on." 

He never complained about me gaining weight; they won't if they're smart. But he's not complaining about the 20-30 minutes I spend running either. 

Hey, do you. Work out. Find your girl time. Be the best you.

3 Things My Husband Has In Common With Nathan Scott.

Alright, y'all. Cory has specifically requested that I not write personal things about him, though I can't imagine why he wouldn't want the whole world to know every charming thing about him that I know. 

Actually, considering I know now only charming things, but embarrassing things, I might be able to understand..

Anways, sharing common knowledge facts can't be something that will get me into trouble, surely.. 

If you aren't familiar with One Tree Hill, I can't be responsible if you don't understand the references, and the fact that I'm totally fan girl-ing right now. That being said, here goes.

1. High school jock

"In season one, Nathan was introduced as the selfish, jock basketball player for the Tree Hill Ravens."

I'm not referring to "jock" as a bad thing at all. It's endearing really. They ball hard, they play hard- and sometimes it's not just the game of basketball that they're playing. Not to say that my now charming husband is a player, oh no. Quite the opposite really. Like Nathan Scott, Cory has outgrown that game. Now he plays the game of "Try Not to Anger Your Wife Today." It's much harder and requires much more mental strength. On a day to day basis, his stats are going strong.

2. Pretty Boy

Funny story, but long before I came along, Cory took some classes with a couple of my cousins. He didn't know that, of course, considering the size of my family is approximately ginormous, and trying to find a Dixon in a classroom is like trying to find a bobby-pin in my hair: pointless. Moral of this story is that my sweet little cousins didn't know his name, so they referred to him as Pretty Boy. I think Cory finds this nickname offensive, perhaps, but for the life of me, I have no idea why. It could completely be the fact that I'm married to him, but I certain agree that he's the prettiest boy around! (If you don't know how this relates to Nathan Scott, allow Google to help you out. Like now.. he's pretty pretty as well). 

3. He's a Lover and a Fighter

For you faithful One Tree Hillers, you know that Nathan and Haley faced and overcame many obstacles. For you married ladies and gents, you know that's just a part of life.. and marriage. There were so many points that they could've just called it quits- we all could. But we don't. Because what is life without the one you love? We could probably all agree that Nathan said it best- "What I'm feeling is definitely not normal. And to be honest with you Haley, I don't ever want to be normal. Not with you." Don't get weak in the knees and jealous of my life, Cory hasn't made it to saying those exact words just yet. Point being, Nathan fought for Haley, and I have no doubt Cory would do the same, not just because he'd be without clean undies, but I think that for some reason or another, he loves me just as much as fictional Nathan loved fictional Haley.

Okay, so maybe this post was just a little reminder to myself that love on Netflix and love in real life aren't the same. Maybe it was to remind myself that no matter how good it seems on Netflix, those people don't face the day to day struggles that real life married couples do. Nathan and Haley fought over her riding off on tour to be a rock star. Cory and Cindi fight over who gets to take the car in for an oil change. Nonetheless, I encourage you to find yourself a close to perfect TV star and compare him/her to your husband/wife, not to see who has bigger muscles or more money or anything shallow, but for this reason: you realize how many cute, quirky attributes your real life partner has, and you know what makes them so great? They're your real life. 

"You can drive at sixteen, go to war at eighteen and drink at twenty-one. So how old do you have to be for your love to be real?" 
-One Tree Hill

Are We Having a Baby Soon?

I feel that there are a few major accomplishments in life. They differ for everyone, but here are a few: graduating high school, getting a college degree, buying a house, getting married, establishing a career and having children.

At the age of 21, I have accomplished all but one of these.

Where am I going with this?

Well, part of having a job that requires your patient to be laid back with mouths wide open means they ask you questions that you have to talk about for a long time; i.e. "how did you and your husband meet?" "what's your hometown like?" and my personal favorite "why don't you tell me about yourself?" All of those questions are great conversation starters, and other than feeling like I'm at a job interview or something just as intimidating, I typically like to have these sort of conversations with my patients.

However, as soon as I mention that I'm married, the topic turns to babies. Don't get me wrong, babies are great. They're little rockets of puke and poop that disturb the peace and cut into all of your Netflix time. Just kidding. Many of you are probably moms, and kudos to you. I am not quite ready to not be selfish. I know that a huge part of your life is no longer yours when you have kids. It's insane to think that life will ever be the same after babies.

Granted, this post won't be able to cover my every thought and feeling on young married couples and babies, but bear with me. For some couples, getting married and then having a baby soon after works for them. That's what they want and that's great! They're great moms and dads and life is good. On the other hand, I know people who have been married for six years and haven't had a baby yet, and everyone on the planet is wondering why and oh so ready for them to have a baby, but you know what? They're 24ish. That's probably why they haven't had kids yet. Like marriage, I feel that children don't come with an age. There's no certain age you should get married. You don't even have to ever get married. You don't have to have or not have children at a certain age. Heck, you don't ever have to have them. For me, marriage and children come with maturity. 

I have literally seen couples who have been married for 8 years and dated for a billion before that, and I would never let them even babysit my nonexistent baby. That may sound harsh, but come on. You know that there are friends/family members/whoever that you pray are never the last people on planet Earth that you would have to have be guardian and protector of your child for even 2 hours. Probably because they aren't mature enough to put a baby's needs before a video game, or patient enough to let a baby cry it out and then move along with life.

Right now, I don't want a baby. I don't want my sleep interrupted, I don't want to not go see a movie I want, I don't want to have another human life depending on me. Isn't it better that I know that now instead of after having a baby?

What really sent me on this small rant was that everybody. every. body. has been asking me this. Are we going to have a baby soon? Are we thinking about starting a family? Oh my word, we're still thinking "I have to cook dinner every night?!" and "Why doesn't Cory make the bed?" Okay, that's not "we" thinking, it's just me. Regardless, the final straw- I went to get my nails done yesterday and as soon as the girl asked if I was married, she asked if we had kids or wanted to have any soon. Considering the fact that I still look like I'm about 14, I know she was only asking because I'm married.  Since when did getting married become the stepping stone right before parenthood?

Hey, if you're one of the people that has asked if we're having a baby soon, want to have kids in the near future, etc., let's get this clear-- I am NOT mad at you. And for those of you who know me well enough to say "Don't do it yet. Enjoy some time just the two of you. Wait a while to have kids," thanks.

My only point is this- everyone is different. Every person, every couple. Young marriage faces enough challenges of it's own without having a baby. I honestly can't imagine having a baby right now, and guess what? That's so so so fine. Because it's my life that changes when I have a baby. And I'm only TWENTY-ONE. Most 21 year old females are still in college, or just graduating and starting their jobs. Isn't that a big enough life accomplishment for now? I think it is.

I completely expect a jillion more people to ask me about this topic, and I'll just keep smiling and explaining that I don't have shirts that I want puke on just yet. God's timing is perfect, no doubt. When it's time, it'll be time. Until then, I'm going to enjoy a toy free zone.

So, in answer to the title, no.

All American Girl.

Ahh, dating. I see the whole point of dating as a means to find someone that you love, someone to marry. There are people that date for fun, but how does that usually turn out if all they're looking for is fun? Broken hearts. His or hers. Someone puts more into it than the other and then bam. You've got a girl eating ice cream, crying and snotting on her best friend, wondering why she wasn't good enough. We've all been there, done that. I  saw different ways of dating in other countries and thought they'd be fun facts to share! 

Dating Fact: In Brazil, two people who fancy one another will usually go out in groups first to see if they like one another. Solo dates will typically only happen should it be leading to a relationship! Now that’s serious.

Okay, I guess it's not a terrible idea to go out in groups. It could prevent all sorts of things, like date rape, dating psycho killers, etc. However, I'd say it's a little drastic to only go out solo if you're interested in a long term relationship. I mean, people act so differently in group settings than one on one. Guys are too cool to talk to you in a group, but all they really want to do is talk to you. So take it from me, guys, if you like a girl, ask her out. Not out to go with your buddies to a burger joint. Out on a real date. Just the two of you. Unless you're a psycho killer.. then you should probably just not ask her out at all.

Dating Fact: In France, there’s no conversation of whether or not you’re actually in a relationship. The French are much more laid-back when it comes to dating, meaning they don’t really believe in the whole concept of dating all that much. You’re either not dating or you’re together. Confusing, no?

Confusing, no. I'm not French, I'm an all American girl, so if you want to be in a relationship, you'd better shout it from the rooftops or I'm gonna find a guy that will! Dating exclusively leads to less broken hearts. French "not dating" leads to all kinds of people thinking they've got dibs on the hottie with abs, while he's got dibs on every girl in a bikini.. confusing, no?

Dating Fact: Ever heard of being fashionably late? Not in Japan, you haven’t! When someone gives you a set time, and you don’t show up exactly when you said you’d be there, you’d better have a catastrophic excuse or risk never being spoken to again. Better never than late!

I'd never make it in Japan. It's not that we, as females, try to be late to every appointment, date or interview known to man. But sometimes things happen. You notice you've got a stray strand of your Afro sticking straight up that needs hair-sprayed down real quick before you leave. There's a cup in the sink you could throw in the dishwasher. You leave and wonder if you locked your door.. there's no sure way to know so you go back to check. It happens. Cory tells me that if I'm not early, I'm late. So I basically feel like I'm in Japan everyday. But as far as dating goes, geesh. Chill out, guys. Better late than never.

Dating Fact: A little jealousy here and there keeps the love alive, but when dating an Italian, a wandering eye is not an option. Italians can be very possessive of their significant others at times, almost to the point where they feel as if you belong to them and only them.

Eh, I'm pretty sure that's not only Italians.. "wandering eyes lead to no eyes." Haven't you ever heard that? Oh wait, that's right. I made it up. But really. If Cory sees a girl in an itsy bitsy teeny bathing suit and says "man, she's hot.." then wow. All of the sudden it's man, he has no eyes. Because I probably just jabbed them out with my teasing comb. It's called respect. If you see a guy with a 20 pack lookin' like he just got off the Baywatch set, don't tell your husband how hot that guy is. It does the same thing to them that it does to us- it makes him feel like he doesn't measure up to the perfect guy in your eyes. And you know what? Obviously he does because you married him.

Dating Fact: In the U.S., equality is certainly not a foreign concept. In Australia, however, equality falls into all facets of everyday life, including when it comes time to pay the bill. So don’t be alarmed if you’re asked to split evenly on a date!

Ladies, be thankful to not be in Australia. Just kidddding. I think there are certain times when it's okay to split the check. For instance, you both mutually agree it would be fun to "hang out," not calling it a date; you have dinner, check comes, you split it to be nice. Then he asks you out again. Then he's paying. Well, that's how it is in America anyway. 

Dating Fact: In Spain, it’s all about a good game, even outside of the fútbol field. So don’t hate the player, and you know what, don’t hate the game! Try not to be too interested at the beginning, because the Spanish love a good chase. But remember, should you actually be interested, best not to be too coy for too long.

Earth to women, that's an American rule too. And sometimes, it's okay to hate the player and the game; if you're not interested in playing games, there are certain guys you shouldn't go after, and you probably know who that guy is. His reputation proceeds him. With that being said, if you are interested, go for it. It's not all about the chase, and if he's a guy worth being with, you won't have to go for it. He will. 

Dating Fact: Don’t be surprised if your interaction with a Russian is… touchier than usual. Many times, Russians will stand within a close proximity when speaking and consider consistent contact a gesture of friendship.

Maybe that's cute in Russia, but I think it's a little creepy. You don't have to be standing so close to me that I can make a prediction about what you had for lunch due to smelling your breath. In fact, I have to beg Cory to touch me in public. NO PDA. But come on, dude. Holding my hand is not PDA. He still has some things to learn. 

Dating Fact: Say goodbye to small talk! Germans are all about the real deal. Shallow, superficial conversation is not appreciated in German culture, as they consider it inauthentic and disallowing of a true connection. Time to keep it 100!

Keeping it 100 is never a bad idea, no matter the country. Dating leads to relationships, relationships lead to marriage. If you're not used to keeping it real in the beginning, it won't be a part of your marriage. And that's just not good news.

Dating Fact: Be wary of solely relying on physical gestures to communicate with the Greeks. They often consider even the slightest gestures, like nodding, rude and offensive. Not cool, K?

I almost have no comment, other than Greeks may be way to easy to offend. Don't offend your husband though. Sometimes he makes you mad and you want to just tick him off by pushing just the right button, so you do. Then he does. Then you're both shallow for doing it. So just don't. Life will be easier that way. ;)



* All "dating facts" came from
http://www.buzzfeed.com/h2/osmo/rosettastone/things-you-have-to-know-when-dating-around-the-world?b=1

That's So Annoying.

They probably don't mean to. Getting on your nerves isn't actually his main goal in life. Sometimes it just happens. Here are a few things that I just can't handle, yet they happen on the reg.

1. Why is there urine on the toilet seat?

I didn't know about this until I lived with a man. So, like a nice man, Cory raises the seat. Although he insists that it isn't fair that he has to lift the seat to pee, then put it down for me, he does it anyway. After I almost fell in the toilet a few times in the middle of the night. He tries to say he doesn't use the toilet when the seat is down, but I happen to know it's humanly impossible to live without pooping (sorry about the p word), therefore.. I know he does use it with the seat down. Also, he's over six feet tall which probably has something to do with said urine on the seat. Either way, you put it there. Not me. Please, clean it off.

2. How do you even have any hair on your body? I could've sworn I just saw it all over the sink. 

Cory doesn't have to tell me when he shaves his face. Sometimes I notice on my own. Sometimes I see enough hair on the bathroom sink to make a small wig. Either way, you put it there. Not me. Please, clean it off. On the off chance that he doesn't know how, show him. That way next time you find hair everywhere, he can't say he wasn't sure how to get it all off.

3. Tell me you love me or something before you ask me what's for dinner.

Hello, my new title is wife. Not maid. I hate cooking, but that's not the point. The point it, I do it.. usuallly. And before I do, LOVE ME. Kiss me, hug me, tell me I look so sexy in my scrubs. Then you can request freakin steak and mashed potatoes.

4. Do I have any clean pants?

Hmm, you're probably just asking that question because you've already looked in the closet and know you don't have any clean pants so you want me to wash them for you for work tomorrow. At 9 p.m. Yeah, that one actually just happened. Spin cycle is happening as we speak.




This may be a good thing for my marriage, but I can't think of any more annoying things at the moment. I happen to know that there are more unbelievably annoying things that he does, they just aren't coming to mind. #1 and #2 are the worst, but hey, that's life. I can live with cleaning the toilet and the sink. As long as he can live with tickling my back and watching One Tree Hill. All is fair in love.

Wanna know the best part? Cory has little to no idea that he annoys me with these things. It's not likely he artfully places urine on the toilet seat or gently places hair after hair on the sink. Just like I do things that annoy him to no end and I have no idea what they are because he doesn't dwell on them.

Marriage.. ahh. Two people annoying each other for the rest of their lives. What could be better?

10 Things Married People Want You to Know: Rebuttal and Praise

I saw this link on Facebook yesterday, and while the hopeless romantic in me agrees with most of it, here are my thoughts and opinions. Enjoy Endure if you must.

1. "Most of the time you spend together is going to be non-sexual, so you better be best friends, or it won't last."

Cindi Says: WORD. Most of the time you spend together IS non-sexual, but your S.O. doesn't necessarily plan for life to be that way. You will, mark my words, find yourself all cuddled up and wanting to just be cuddly, then bam. It's like a light went off inside his head wanting to not just be cuddly. Unfortunately for him, the only light going off in your head is the thought that only ice cream could make this night better. Sorry, boys. It's cuddles, chick flicks and cookie dough for us. Non-sexual quality time. Ahhhh. 

2. "… I once read that if love can be explained then it isn't love, it's an exchange of benefits. You may love her long blonde hair, her perfect smile and her great figure but the body changes over time and life throws curves. If you don't think you could handle the changes that life will bring then you aren't in love, you are in lust…"

Cindi Says: Love can be explained. When you can tell someone why you love your husband, there you are, explaining. I love Cory because he makes me feel special when he doesn't even try. He gets so excited over little things, like me complying to his demands of chocolate chip cookies from CFA. He works hard to provide for me and our future family. He puts my every need before his. I could go on and on, explaining. The body changes over time.. word again. I don't have any rebuttal to that, other than.. don't worry. Your husband may have loved you for your beautiful bod and lush lips at first, but then he fell in love with your laugh, your ability to make him feel wanted.. and those, my ladies, are things that time can't take away. 

3. "Don't stop dating your S.O."

Cindi Says: Don't stop dating, but definitely stop spending so much money. Dates don't have to carry the burden of impressing your s.o. They are YOUR s.o. And with being yours, they already want you. So go to the park, spread out your blankey, and be content with the fact that you're spending zero dollars and making a memory. PSA: men: that doesn't mean don't buy birthday, anniversary or Christmas gifts, don't celebrate significant times, etc. etc. Just know that you don't have to spend money to impress girls. They're more infatuated with your ability to come up with an expressive, inexpensive date! 

4. "[Remember] that they are the same person after the new labels. I've seen it all fall apart because the boyfriend's cute little habits were not something a husband should do. ‘We are married now! You can't do that!' It's easy to get lost in labels (because Wife and Husband are long defined terms. They come with much baggage.). If your girlfriend sucked at dishes, news flash, your wife will too.

Cindi Says: By "much baggage," they mean bills. House payment, water bill, phone bill, electric bill, insurance, car payment, truck payment.. MUCH BAGGAGE. If your girlfriend was an obsessive OCD freak who always wants everything in it's place, your wife will be too. Sorry, Cor. Likewise, if your boyfriend never had to do his own laundry, your husband won't know how. Instead of getting mad about things that you didn't even know you didn't like about each other, use it as a learning opportunity. For instance, I made sticky notes that say "Clean: Cory, it's okay to leave your dishes in the sink" & "Dirty: Cory! Put your dishes in the dishwasher!" Now, this may make him feel like he's 5. But guess what? The dishes are going where you need them. Just because you're a husband and a wife now, doesn't mean you forget how to act like a boyfriend and a girlfriend. It's SO easy to let the baggage overwhelm you. Just take a step back. Breathe. And love your husband. 

5. "[My] advice can be summed up in two words: Don't lie. Almost every major problem within relationships starts with a lie. If your relationship can handle the truth, then it can handle anything."

Cindi Says: Agree. Also, don't ask questions that may even need to be thought about lying about. If you can't handle the truth, don't ask the question. We all have a past. It's highly likely that you didn't marry the first person you ever dated. I so wish I could change many things in my past, but that's just not the way the world works. So, don't lie. Don't ask what you deeeeep down in your heart don't even want to know. I've asked a couple of those questions and you know what? He didn't lie. Now, I know the answer to my questions, but for what? The past is the past. It's there for a reason. Most importantly, your past is not your future.  

6. "When arguing, seek to understand before seeking to be understood."

Cindi Says: Again, I have no rebuttal for this one.. If only I could follow this rule every time we got into a dumb argument over something silly.. Men tend to get more worked up every passing second of an argument. Don't get defensive, put up your wall and yell about why you're right. Get where he's coming from. Then back yourself up. He's more likely to WANT to understand where you're coming from. Jussayin. 

7. "Frequently express your appreciation and affection for the smallest things even. ‘Thank you for taking out the trash.' ‘I like what you did with the dining room.' ‘You look really nice today.' ‘I love you…'

If your husband tells you thank you for everything you do, praise him and never ever let him leave your side. Oh my lanta. I wish. It's usually me saying "Thank you for taking out the trash." Sarcastically, after I take it out because I'm tired of him not remembering that it's Wednesday, and the trash goes out ON WEDNESDAY. Anyhoo, while it's nice and dandy to be so expressive of your appreciation, it doesn't always happen. You deal with it. Life isn't measured by the number of times you take the trash out anyway, right? It's measured by how many deep breaths you have to take to not yell at your husband for not doing it. Again. :) 

8. "… Find a place/way for you to communicate openly, and be vulnerable. Someone else said they hop in the tub with their SO, my husband and I have difficult/emotional conversations while holding each other in bed…"

Cindi Says: Back to #1. Non-sexual time. Tubs and beds don't seem non-sexual to me, but hey, this is my blog and therefore, my opinion. Maybe you can hop in the tub and talk about your day. I'd prefer to be curled up in the fetal position in the middle of the living room floor or something. With my Medusa-like hair all over the place. Or something like that. Something totally in no way being taken as sexual time. I want to whine, be vulnerable, have an emotional conversation.. all while being 100% u-g-l-y so that there's no misunderstanding. 

9. "For a long term partnership to work, abandon any notion you have that responsibility is shared 50/50 between partners. Each is responsible for 100 % — and you always check one another's back…"

Cindi Says: False. If you feel responsible for 100%, you're going to be stressed, moody, mean.. all of which are not emotions that your husband likes. If you know that you are part of a team that is going to get the job done, life is so much easier. Granted, I know if I fell and broke my wrist and couldn't work, Cory would take care of us. But why would I want to put all of that pressure on him if it's not necessary? I'll do my part, he'll do his part, we'll pay off our "much baggage" every month, and we'll be happy doing it, knowing that we're both working hard to make life work. 

10. "Tell each other you love them. Every time you meet or leave, several times a day. Hold hands. Touch. Share everything, thoughts, feelings, jokes, food, drinks. Take care of each other. Both should always put the other first, you will end up compromising from the top down instead of the bottom up, thus avoiding resentment. Never take without giving. Don't sweat the small stuff. Laugh, Laugh, Laugh, Enjoy life."

Cindi Says: Don't just say you love him, show him. Every day. Whether it be bringing him home cookies from Chic-Fil-A, letting him tell you about the muffler he ordered.. whatever. Just listen to him. Love him. Hug him. It's so hard for him to be mad at you when you hug him. Don't sweat the small stuff, but don't let the small stuff turn into big stuff. There are some things you let him share with his boys. Trust me, we just don't think their humor is.. ehh, funny, at times. But the boys.. oh, they love it. It's hilarious. Who knew? And yes, ALWAYS take care of each other. It's the Golden Rule. 

My Very First Post.

I used to blog a lot when I was young. Well, I'm still young, but younger. Tiny teenager young. I tried to remember what kinds of things I could have possibly had to write about, but nothing important is coming to mind.. Maybe I wrote about what boy I liked or what my summer vacation would be like.. But oh, how things have changed. I'm still young, but I'm married. 

I want to devote this blog (well, most of it) to marriage. More specifically, my marriage. So first, in case you don't know me or my significant other, here's a little overview. We got married on May 10th of this year. I'm Cindi. I'm a dental hygienist, I love to talk, I love to craft. Cory, my husband, is a born and bred logger who also has his CDL license (and his initials are CDL, isn't that cute?). He lives and breathes work. He just asked what I was doing, and when I said "blogging," he asked if I was mad at him. Apparently, to men, blogging also means "venting." Well, not here. Not now, anyways. 

Hard Knocks and Little Love Talks was just a random thought one day while driving back to my home town. I thought "it'd be nice to see how other young people deal with married life"- the good, bad and very ugly. Also, I've learned that after the hard knocks, come the little love talks.

I know married people fight. I've heard it, seen it.. but I also heard (or read) that married people typically fight/argue/have disagreements over money. If I were to ask my Papa if that was true, he'd just tell me that when you don't have any money, it's easy to not fight over it. Or something like that. Anyways, I'm here to tell you that most of our arguments are not about money. Or family. Or probably any other normal thing to argue about. We bicker over the really  important things, like what temperature to set the AC on, who should mow the yard and where to eat at when I don't want to cook (which is a lot, because no one ever told me that my plan to marry someone who loved to cook might fall through). Unfortunately, it's not socially acceptable to ask other people what they fight about with their husband or wife, so I don't know for sure what other married people argue about, but I do know that about 99.9% of the things we bicker about are completely irrelevant to life.

Oh, but we're happy. See, hard knocks come in many shapes and forms, and when you realize that, you're prepared to deal with the situation and move on. 

Main thought for the day: I heard a man today say something to the effect of wanting Jesus Christ to be the very center of every single thing. His marriage. His family. His profession. His lunch dates. His Super Bowl parties. And, while it could seem silly that someone would care about details that seem minute, it got me thinking. Something is the cornerstone of your marriage. Something, whether it be greed, pride or Jesus, is the cornerstone. 

Ephesians 2:20&21

.."And are built upon the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Jesus Christ himself being the chief cornerstone; In whom all the building fitly framed together groweth unto an holy temple in the Lord:"

If your building (marriage) is centered around Jesus, the building (marriage) will be fitly framed together. Be sure your frame is built around the Chief Cornerstone, and don't fight over who gets to use up all the hot water first tonight!

-Cindi